On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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