we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
