get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
