you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
