I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
