Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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