hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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