we're blogging at a bar
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Randomize