Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
