Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
