dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize