oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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