No, you can still breathe under the balls.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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