they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
