when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
