Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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