I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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