remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
