I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
