The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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