Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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