question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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