doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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