11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
