Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
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