Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
