I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Your shirt... Was in my pants
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
wow bdsm is so cute
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