I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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