I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize