she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
