so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
