More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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