Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
