D3 body, D1 cock
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
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