1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
