ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
