Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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