don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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