Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
