AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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