the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
