so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Randomize
