i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
