Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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