Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
