Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Green mimosas i think yes
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
