Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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