I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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