Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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