Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.

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(614): View more from Ohio

Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?

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(817): View more from Texas

I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.

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(606): View more from Kentucky

VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS

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(406): View more from Montana

You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.

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(708): View more from Illinois

just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.

(1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

what else are best friends for?

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(207): View more from Maine

I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.

(1-207): View more from Maine

Are you high?

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